One last rant

Yes, please allow me one more rant about people who give gifts they can’t really afford. Most of the time, I really can’t afford to buy gifts for everyone I know. Sometimes it is hard enough for me to budget in gifts for my own kids! So I don’t give gifts and I don’t expect them either.

Now if you are going to give me gifts, I am happy to receive them. I am appreciative. But there is one always that one person that I wish I never got a gift from. Right now, I am wishing I can give the gift back.

Now don’t give and then complain to the recipient later on about how much you spent buying gifts and now you are broke? WTF!! Sometimes I can’t figure out if some of these people are just crass or just clueless.

Giving is a Selfish Act

Some people delude themselves into thinking that their act of giving is due to their unselfish nature when in fact it is the very opposite that is true.

When I give, I do try very hard to give unselfishly, give only what I can afford, and expect nothing in return. When I cannot afford to give it, then I don’t. I suppose I am selfish that way.

I have known many people though who make a big show of giving. Do you know of someone who is always giving you something whether you need it or not and then makes it a point to mention what she has given you in front of someone else? I know of someone who I used to accept clothing from. I don’t mind wearing someone’s hand me down if it’s in good condition and style that I prefer. I am not picky that way; and I am most appreciative when I get free clothes. I don’t appreciate being asked, in front of other people, if that pretty shirt I’m wearing is the one she gave me? What, now do you expect me to thank you in public so they can all see what a generous person you are? You have so much that you can afford to give your possessions away? Would it boost your ego? Do you really think those people are impressed by this show? I don’t know.

Others give to charities for various reasons, a lot of them not for charities’ sake. Many give because they get a tax break, others give to get the free giveaways, and many more give just to see their name in lights, in publications in bricks, or whatever. If I ever give to any charity, I hope I give because I want to and not because of the free stickers.

Even the ones who do what one would think is the ultimate act of giving, adopting a child into their homes, if they are honest with themselves are doing it for selfish reasons. Don’t we want to have someone to love us as unconditionally as a child? Don’t we want someone to love and hold and hug and shower with affection?

Most of the time that is why people do the things they do, because they get something from it. It is very difficult to do something and not get nothing in return. You always get something in return. I suppose it’s up to you too, how you’d want to handle those gifts in return.

Finding meaning in Christmas

The holidays can be a hard time for most people. I know, I have been there. I’ve put myself there more often than I would like, but I’m working on it. I’m working on not letting the holidays get me down or worry me because really, it shouldn’t be a source of worry or stress. It’s the hype and commercialism that’s been attached to it that makes us worry and stressed. Take that out, and we may find the true meaning of Christmas again.

I am not religious at all so it is hard for me to buy into the celebrating the birth of Christ idea. Besides, December 25 is not even his real birthday if you bother to do some research. It is what the birth of Christ symbolizes that is really being celebrated this time of year. At least I’d like to think so. I don’t think that this celebration is about how bright you can deck your houses, it’s not about how many gifts you get or receive or how expensive they are, it’s not about who can throw the most lavish parties or who has the best table settings, it’s not about gorging yourself on rich foods that takes you all year to lose the effects of, and it is definitely not about a fat man coming through your chimney to eat your cookies.

Here is what I think these holidays mean.

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